Friday, December 07, 2007

Laden with guilt and fear...

Truth #2: I am feel fearful and guilty all the time

I believe that guilt brings us away from the things that matter most to us. For me, I admire those who can continue to stand by and be close to the one person you know whose opinion matters and that when you did something wrong, is able to look the person in the eye and say, "Yes I know I am making a mistake but I choose it and am willing to face the consequences for it. But despite it all, I still love you and I know you do!".

This is a powerful and mature statement. If only I can abide by it. I am so driven by approval that I never allow myself to get out of line, and if I do, I hide it til the cows come home. A very unpleasant feeling..

Today, I aspire to not allow fear and guilt be my guide. I will be who I am and be proud of it.

No. 1 - I like snacks and I will not hide them anymore in the nook & cranies in my room because I can feel the judgemental eyes accompanying the 'that's-why-you-fat' philosphy.

No. 2 - Just because I sin does not mean I have to backslide and be angry at God. He still loves me no matter what, and I should be close to Him and not feel guilty for what I did but slowly learn thru His motivation.

No. 3 - I will send out the resumes that I meant to send out and not be afraid of rejection. I will be brave.....and not think I am not good enough.

So, today, with you as my witness, I will improve........

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