Thursday, October 09, 2008

End of semester here...

It's crunch time again...the end of semester is here and I am going through the vicious cycles again of stress and slacking. I am not proud of how much I procrastinate but this semester motivation seems dim. I am teamed up with the smartest and most knowledgeable bunch in all my subjects...so when I go for group meetings it seems like a battle to prove my worth to be standing amongst them. There is no balance in the group as my opinions seem to slip through the cracks and never acknowledged.

Since arriving in Australia, I have learned much from my low ranking job as a servo girl that there should be no one who makes you feel lower; that everyone is equal. I no longer stand there quietly when people talk down to me and I do not think myself lowly just because I am a poor student working in a petrol station.

However, with this group assignments, I go to them dreading how they would put me down and yet I feel the same apprehension and fear of telling them what I think. Of asking them to maybe speak to me as an equal. Yes, I may be Asian and my accent is not superior to you...but I am proud to be Malaysian...and I am also as smart if you would allow me that freedom of speech. Ok...maybe I have not been taught active out-of-the-box thinking...but I do try and learn. And I am sure not all of my stuff are that bad....

Anyway, enough complaining Erin and get back to work....hahahah

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