back to school....URGH!!!
Well...I'm back to uni and the week has just started again...gosh...so annoying....but yesterday was nice. I had tons of fun with my best friend Mr. MCP...playing scrabble and talking and tossing friends into the pool. I am so sad that he is going off...but im glad that he gave me a precious hug before he went off. He never agreed to do so ever last time...I don't understand the sudden change!
Went out for lunch with a few new friends. Real cool people man! I wonder why I never met them before. They are people who knows what they want and work towards it. The don't take crap from people and they are confident in everything they do. This people inspire me to be more excellent and be better. I'm so glad to have met them. Aree (my kak angkat here in LUCT) was so nice to help me with my chores of buying new furniture...which I need to have a car for cuz those things are not light man. Going to have class in half an hour and I need to do more research. So going to concentrate on that........
Mid Valley Disaster
Yeah...finally got my place...my own place. Its still in Vista Prima....in Bandar Bukit Puchong....the same bloody block...not much changes just that I now have my own room and I am allowed to furnish it my own way. My good friend Debbie who was supposed to be my housemate couldn't afford the place and I am going to miss her so much. I don't get to see her much now when we are still currently staying together in the old house.Imagine now when she moves into another condo and I into a different one. She would be like an alien to me!!!! I guess I have to make the effort so things don't go astray. Everything got finalized today when I was in Mid Valley.
Yes...I am at Mid Valley now...with my best friend Mr. MCP. The disaster was....he was supposed to meet me at noon but he overslept and made me wait for 2 hours before he actually had the guts to show his face to me. Then he wouldnt even want to give me a sound explanation for why he was late. Talk about irresponsible man. He got pissed by me pushing him to tell and I got pissed that he didn't want to explain. I just walked off ready to go home after my 2 hour wait when he suddenly sms-ed me to say he was sorry and he just didn't want to talk about it. Talk about MCP characteristics. Men just expect you to understand everything....but we don't and it tortures us to have to figure it out on our own. Human communication is one of the biggest mysteries of science! But he was nice enough to make up for his "many" sins by bringing me out for lunch. Then came the big trouble of ordering.
As recently I have turned vegetarian, there is not much on the Chilis menu for one...so all I had was tortilla chips with salsa. I stole some mushrooms from his platter of yummy beef steak kind of enlarged hotdog kind of thing. He is still wondering why I turned vegetarian. I told him that it was to sacrifice so that he has good success in China. That was actually the secondary reason but it was nice to try to get him touched over my good deed. Hahahhaha...though he did not show it but i think he was kind of surprised to hear bout it. It is a reaction no doubt, even though it was not what I imagined the reaction would be. The main reason I was turning vegetarian was so that I could detoxificate my body from all the bad stuff for about 3 months...you know...with all the unhealthy diet I have been practising since Chinese New Year....of abundant feast!!! I tried chicken a few days ago...to test myself...only to find myself uncomfortable and feeling heavy in the stomach. Maybe I might turn vegetarian all together if my mom doesnt kill me first.... = 0 (
I so can't believe this.....I am only about back in uni 3 days and I already have assignments pilling up so high I can't even see above it. Damn...this is so frustrating! And guess what....all the assignments are due next week. Talk about a head start....is this like a turbo start. I have a tutorial presentation next week...and I must come up with the most interesting essay ever by next Tues....how can life get any more horrible??
Oh ya...to add to the stress of "first days of school syndrome" I am also so stressed out about my accomodation. I have already found a place though it is a bit expensive but it is the cheapest around...RM200 for a partially furnished house. But my other housemate thinks it is too expensive so she is backing out of the deal. Thus how now? I need to find a new housemate or I will be doomed as being so homeless forever....Damn!!!
Next, I have to think about this new deal I got for a second hand NIkon F55. If u know bout cameras pls advice me whether buying it second hand after 2 yrs of handling from the owner at the price of RM500 is a good deal?? Thanks....cuz my bro says that it is a horrible deal yet many other friends of mine in the uni says that is a GREAT deal. See how conplicated my life is!!!!
Next, Im burdened with the fact of my best friend moving and the possibility that the guy that says he is "waiting" for me back is KK is not actually waiting....meaning I am the one here being the silly fool and falling for his stupid tricks.
However, I did decide to improve myself to a more efficient and knowledgable level. So I'm still pushing myself to read as many books as possible. So unlikely with all the thing I have on my mind now....ARGH....I hate being an adult!
First Day of Uni!!!
Yeah...uni has finally started and I have something to channel all my energy to. Im sick of being lazy all this time hahahhaha. Well, during this weekend which I had nothing to do...I cried like twice over the fact that my best friend was going off. My "guy" waiting back in Sabah was too busy with his own assignments to even care that I was sad. Maybe this relationship is not going too well....but who cares...this is life after all...one can't really predict the future right???
It is so boring man...I have nothing to do...my laptop cant receive the wireless connection and I cant even chat with anyone. Thank God at least one computer lab out of the millions(NOT!) here has internet connection but its kinda slow. I took the 8 am bus here only to realise that my timetable is NOT out yet and I had to wait another like 2 hours before it was out. The timetable was supposing supposed to be out last week. This uni sucks like crazy...when it comes to admin and management stuff. Their lecturers at least a little better.
But I did get to meet a few nice people this year thanks to my many friends for introducing them. And my new housemate are kinda nice once u get to know them better. I can't say that I am feeling at home now with them...but at least we do get along fine. I still don't have a new place to live in and am bogging my mind down with lots of worries bout it. Imagine me and my stuff out in the swimming pool for the rest of the year...inefficient people as it is....I'm talking bout my agent!!!!
Forgot to mention....yesterday I went for a swim with a few friends. They left early except one. Suddenly, this two African guys came up to me and said "Hi! How long have u been back?" I was shocked. I was wondering if I knew this guys or not from last semester. But they did not look familiar at all. I just gave a vague answer and continued on my way. Then they started chatting with my friend by the pool who was watching me swim. I though "phew....must be his friends la!". Apparently, the real story is...no one knows those guys....they are new to the uni...they just use that tactic to get to the girls...smart move I would say!!!
Finally got my timetable and class was supposed to start at 1 pm. We and a whole bunch of mass communication students were there punctually as usual. By 1.15 pm the room was pilling up nicely to a crowded and noisy "pasar". By 1.30 pm everyone was getting agitated at the fact that there was no lecturer. My friend Kelly a.k.a. mak angkat couldnt stand the wait anymore and decided to make action. She stormed to the faculty to give the lecturer a piece of his mind only to find out that they too could not contact him on reminder that he has a class. What a weird weird world? The 2nd class after that was also cancelled...how morbid!! I was so prepared for the first day of class...all I ended up doing was going to Alexis in Bangsar to have lunch. Man that was one expensive place to eat...Rm17 for chicken rice!
I gave my best friend Mr. MCP a surprise visit at his England Optical shop. Only to see how lazy he is. All they do all day is wait for customers...if there are none than they go online and have fun. Dui....so nice! Even when I was working in Sabah as a supervisor I had more work than that...and he gets paid twice as much as I do. Anyway, back to the main point of the story...he did not even appreciate the effort and heart I put into visiting. Gosh...was I so mad but what can I do.......
I am so sad and devastated!!!!
Uni has started. Had to go back to do registration a few days ago. Man the line for it was so long....and what a complicated procedure it was hahahahha. I met the person who talked bad bout in and posted all my bad stuff online....I couldnt' believe that I was so nice to her....helping her to settle her stuff and all. Guess I'm not that heartless as I thought.
I'm so sad today. My best friend( i.e. Mr. MCP) broke to me the sad news that he is going to move to China for his future purposes. You know la...study...and most of his family is going with him so this means that he won't have a reason to come back to KK. Gosh....I am going to miss him so much. He played a real important part in my life as the person who helped me realise what I truly want in my life. I wonder if it will ever be the same. We spent the whole of today together....movie...tea....and witnessing a Gucci fashion show with one of the models accidentally popping one of her boobs for all to see from her revealing dress....kakakakakka....such a turn on for many of the already drooling men there watching....!!!!
I bought a crystal bracelet that other day (i think it was 2 days ago). I was supposed to open my luck source and also help me in my success in life and also wealth wise. But there was one side effect of it for people who wore it. Their friendships deteriorated in quality or quantity. I do not blame his moving on the crystal but I wonder a lot whether it was wrong to buy it and encourage the karma for him to move.
Valentine's Day...a big hoo haa???
Usually every Valentine's Day comes out to be a bore especially when I was back in KK. It would usually comprise of a hard day of studying and then dinner with my bro & sis. As usual, being "happily" single and all....you will be seeing me a more desperate mood looking at all the couples walking around holding hands. But then again since I am out with a guy (i.e. my bro) it looks like I am not so single anyway.
Well, I have been single for 20 years. This year no different that is until Valentine's Day arrived hahahahah. I went out with my best friend Fiona Jitab to Mid Valley to have dinner on Valentine's Day Eve...and even then it was annoying enough cuz it was already half filled with people buying last minute gift....knowing men!!! That girl decided to oversleep SO poor little old me had to face the mobster of couples on my own till she arrived. She even had the nerve to ask me to make reservations at the restaurant first....*SIGH*. We had chilis for dinner...yum yum!!! No one ever told me that the food there was so excellent. I stayed over at her place that night. She was busy with her bf plan and chatting with her many "fans" online. Single lonely me was sitting on the bed sms-ing the guy who stood me up.
When midnight struck & Valentine's Day has arrived (the most dreaded day!), the conversation between us on sms got a little heated. Well, I'm still single but not so totally available anymore. Distance makes it difficult to be together. I wished we had met earlier or just that he suddenly fly over here. Weird as it was...at least I know now that our relationship now will last a little longer than everyone else expected considering the many times he stood me up.
Miss X & I decided to go to Mid Valley again on Vday. She wanted to get something special for her bf so I was dragged along. But it was nice....we watched Constantine amidst the many couples sitting all around. U can see the seat are seperated into pairs...hahahah. Even when we were buying ticket, people surrounding us were giving us weird stares pondering in their minds if we were a "lesbian" couple. I felt like shouting back " NO WE ARE NOT. We just are a pair that has loved ones far away on this momentos day" . What is the big deal bout valentine's day anyway? So, some guy was made to be remembered as an icon of love. Did that give them a right to fill all the shopping malls and restaurants?I think this is the societies publicity stunt for better sales on that day and a very good reason to raise prices all around Malaysia....hahahah. Ok, so we miss our guys a lot when we look at other couples dating. Allow me this sentiment to be a bit harsh!!!! It was raining heavily so I couldnt go take my bus back to Puchong....had to stay the night again at Miss X's place. So sweet of her.
My guy, Hersley (code name) said that he would wait for me to come back to KK then only start a relationship. I doubt his sincerity. Do you think he would? But how can I have so little faith in him. Well, I guess time will tell the truth...........
CNY Travel Adventure
Sat ( 5th Feb 2005)
Well, I decided to start my post from the day before of my actually Chinese New Year traveling adventure. So this was the last day I was going to be in KK for another 6 months. Kinda saddening if you tell me. I was trying to get everything settled and also to squeeze as many appointments with my friends as possible. But guess what? Things never always work out as you dreamed it. I got my last pay check at Lintas then my boss…yes!!! My BOSS sent me to Center Point to meet my other ex-colleagues. They were demanding so much of my time yet I missed working with them and also hanging out with them. They make you feel so young at times.
Then I met my friend that is studying in Curtin Miri. She is taking the same course as me. Man, when it comes to the same subjects that we take …gosh can she tell me how good everything is. Yes…she is the better student than I. The one that gets the A’s that I dream for. So I had a great time with her cuz (1) we didn’t go into the subject of uni
(2) she is really good for you when it comes to shopping as she knows where to get things (3) she updates me on her relationship with her “romantic” bf….just a good reminder that I am still single hahahahha.
After that I rushed home to meet Arthur for our long awaited swing date. Before we both went on our separate ways of future studies, he used to walk over to my house to have long chats on the swing in the evenings. Yes that sounds so romantic but there was never any passion/love in it. Just friendly chats bout life. He really missed it so he set one that day to only stand me up. How dare he!!! Things have been really weird between us this time that he came back from Russia on the holiday. He asked me out to watch a movie almost everyday since he came back. He also would bring me out for dinner and ask me funny questions like “Aren’t I perfect for you?” (Now, how do you answer a question like that when one doesn’t even have an inkling of romantic notion for a friend?) and such statements like “Even though you think no one would date you, I would”. So the relationship gets freakier by the moment as I started contemplating him as boyfriend material and we started flirting. I even got him a Valentine’s Day gift which he didn’t even appreciate at all. Stupid guy!!! So now its all in a dead end and maybe just a play time for that nerd. Life is just not worth it if we ponder over this kind of stupid things! Right?? Right??
Sun (6th Feb 2005)
I woke up at 6 a.m. to bake the cookies that I promised my best friend Wilson. Wil, you better appreciate it and not complain that it is not nice ah. Though I appreciate all those time you, Wilson Chin, swallowed all the kind of food I cooked for you please this time came with lots of sweat and blood and lack of sleep so please love it for my sake ahahhaha. My parents woke up at 8 a.m. and the chaos starts for their 10 a.m. flight. Everyone was getting ready to go to the airport. My family anyway! I had a later flight at about noon so I was responsible to send them to the airport with (YEAH!) my dad’s Perdana. Man, I was so terover “bangga” even though its nothing but it felt great that my dad trusted me to drive his precious baby. So, I came back and did some last minute stuff while waiting for my uncle to pick me to catch my flight. Things were uneventful in the airport except for the fact that this guy that was supposed to date me “hersley chocolate” sms me to say goodbye. That was so so so sweet! I had tom yam for lunch then went up the plane. There was a slight delay as one of the passenger’s had chicken pox and were not allowed on the plane. So she and her mom had to stay back. But let’s say they did not go without a fight!!!
Reached KLIA on time to meet my parents. Gosh, I was so glad you could connect up to the wireless internet there for free. We had another flight to Kedah where my dad’s hometown was. It was a 5 hour wait. Was so glad to reach Kedah at last. My young cousins were there. Looks the same only grown up a lil more hahahahha. Still cute and real clingy. Here is she right next to me now hahahaha. But then kids are like that aren’t they. But one thing is for sure…I’m not getting married early. Kids can be a burden from enjoying the days of your life. I don’t mind getting them later on but I must have the best of my single hood.
Oh yeah…we had a real nice dinner with my uncle. He brought us for a nice dinner at a restaurant then when we were leaving we disrupted the entrance of the bride to her wedding dinner. Gosh…that was so embarrassing and we didn’t even know her at all. Then, my auntie who came visit us in Sabah during December decided to thank us by bringing us out for supper. I think I must have gained like 5 kgs since arriving.
Mon ( 7th Feb 2004)
Woke up real late then had breakfast. Prawn mee….yum!! So much nice food here in Kedah. I’m so glad I don’t live here long term. Met a lot of my cousins to have a nice chat. Then slept in the afternoon…cuz apparently I am jet-lag. More than I noticed!!! Oh then we went shopping in the mall which was really cool. I got a real sexy dress that my mom disapproves of but you don’t go tell her. I will hunt you down! My dad was driving this real old car and he had trouble driving out from the car park as it was a slope. So embarrassing! All of us had to get out of the car and whenever he tried the slope the car would die. He would then have to restart it again and try again. All the cars behind him were laughing and the security guard was stopping traffic. It was real hilarious. But we did eventually get it up after 5 tries. = ) Then at night my dad brought us to the market. Real nice place….got real cool and cheap handphone thingies!!! Had supper again…hahahah…with my family. We talked bout the silly times when we were younger and the times when we moved from KL to KK. Wonder what life would have been like if I did not move???
Tues ( 8th Feb 2005)
Had to wake up early cause my lil cousins came in and jumped and the bed. They are real cute but people like me also need my privacy at times. We went to Bukit Pinang to visit my older cousins (all married ones except for one…I intend to follow in her footsteps…which is enjoy life first marriage a little later) and then to see my other grandmother. Yes…my grandfather had 2 wives but that is another story. The day was gone with visiting and helping my mom cook the traditional reunion dinner. Now.. I’m online getting my blog updated and hiding from my little cousins…..hahahahhah…!!!
Wed ( 9th Feb 2005)
Yeah!!! The first day of Chinese New Year. The best part of of this festival. Here is where we collect the ang pau from my dad’s many many brothers and sisters. And guess what? Most of my cousins are married so I get to collect from them too. Such a wonderful money making opportunity. I love traditions! When I do get older or married, I want to keep all this wonderful traditions. It is what that makes me Chinese. My family do not really practice it but I would love to relive it back into our daily lives. Ok…so not the troublesome one that are not so beneficial but all this family reunion dinners and sweet memories of family should be kept.
The day started a bit earlier with a hearty breakfast then the day just consist of waiting for all the relatives to arrive and visit. Kedah just had to pick today to be its hottest day….just when I would be wearing my cheong sam top which buttons all the way to the top of my neck. By the time I took it off my neck has lots of painful itchy rashes. Shesh…all this to look pretty! Women can be a little dense when it comes to beauty and fashion.
So, my many cousins and relatives arrive. I notice that they really acknowledge the men of the family. The women just go on with their petty conversations. I did see that for my case…my brother gets all the slaps in the back and the career talk. The only mention of me is “how old are u?” kind of questions. My sister might be a little too young to be included into the adult talk. But then again if I would want to have the Chinese traditions a constant member in my life I would also have to accept the fact that the “men superior attitude” plays a very important role in this tradition thingie.
Once you get older (like around my age) you start to notice more than the red packet filled with precious money in your hand. My other grandmother (the one that is not my dad’s biological mother) hurt her leg and the son & family she is living with has lost a very valuable cook. Not only that the CNY tradition has to be continued with cooking of vinegar pork legs which is quite a tedious dish. Trust me I know!! What pains me is looking at her walk around painfully yet there are carpets everywhere that could cause her to trip. I wish to assist her but am afraid to hurt her pride, as the younger grandmother (my dad’s biological mother) has no problem walking but she is also not so young anymore. I notice that she doses off to sleep on the very spot she is sitting every 2 hours she is awake and all that visiting wore her out. Her health is not so good and her eating diet is not so sufficient as she is quite picky bout what she eats. My dad’s eldest sister got into an accident and the family has one less of a helping hand. Even though her income is cut to a complete nil with her immobility (temporary only don’t you worry) she cheerfully gives out ang pau to her all nieces and nephews. What strength!
My two other cousins (the teenage boys staying in the same house) has changed completely to be real independent but they still do not converse with my little sis & I. I don’t understand why but trust me they love my every loving brother. Shesh! So annoying.
So that’s how the day goes by…with lots of thinking and observing. Now going to take a bath. So hot!! Lots of fireworks flying about outside but cant be observed from my room or any easy assessable spot. DAMN!!
Thurs ( 10th Feb 2005)
The second day of Chinese New Year has arrived. I’m really glad yet kinda sad at the same time. I will leave Kedah today for Melacca at around 5 pm. One weird thing happened. My grandmother got angry at my mom and made her cry. I was so mad that someone would bully my beloved mother and make her sad & cry. Truthfully, I am very protective of my mom and also my family. Everyone calls me the second mother of the house. When my mom is not able to fulfill her duties, I have to step in to take over especially now when I can drive. I feel awful that now I am studying in the university far away from home and there is no one to take care of my darling mommy.
So, to cheer my mom up we brought her to the shopping mall to shop. We brought along our two male cousins (the teenagers…one that is a jay chow wannabe) and guess what is to happen but the worst. The rest went bowling while my mom & I went our separate ways shopping. My cousin the jay-chow-wannabe just was ”so smart” to leave his hand phone on the chair and thus as usual…as we all know…it got stolen. My dad was so “stupid” to actually buy him another one to replace the one he lost. Please tell me why men are so dumb at time and please explain to me why my dad did that? Cause till now I still do not understand why he did it when our family itself is in a financial stress at the moment.
Well, time to leave Kedah and fly to Melacca. Ok...not literally...we flew back to KLIA then met up with my other aunty that is also residing in KK then we both drove back to Melacca. Yum yum...when we arrived he had our infamous Melaccan "lok lok" for supper...but I was too tired to eat much anyway...so sad!!!
Fri (11th Feb 2005)
The day was wonderful as usual. Woke up at around 10 am due to the constant bugging from my po po that girls shouldn't sleep in so late. We had a hearty breakfast together chatting bout the old times. Gosh....i missed her so much. Then she got up to prepare lunch only to be surprised by a knock on her gate. It was her eldest daughter. All her four lovely children decided to surprise her this year with a large family reunion. The day went wonderfully by with lots of chatching up and all. My "tai yi" (my mom's eldest sister) was there with her husband and beloved daughter & spouse...as any Singaporean would be...talking fast and decisive. Then there was my "sai yi" (my mom's elder sister...No. 2) who lives in Sabah and comes visit us every weekend to have chats bout everything in life....her son....*sigh* really looks like a Hong Kong Actor...and guess what???..he has a gf at sucha young age of 14 hahahahah. Then there my mom (daughter No. 3) and us...then there is my uncle who is the youngest and only son...making him the precious one in the Ng family history(not anything big....he just carries on the family name with offsprings!!!).
Our uncle brought us to eat the most excellent cendol and ice kacang...this whole holiday was all about food and I must have gained a lot more weight than I should. I could already feel that the pants are a bit too tight for me...hahaha!
Dinner was one big fuss with the maid coming & the big load of family members and looking for a restaurent during this holiday peak season...either it is closed or packed to the fullest. My poor grandma was practically starving before she got any food. She had to munch on white rice first......so pooor thing.....!!!
Sat (12th Feb 2005)
Had to leave po po early. Couldnt even enjoy her lovely lunch that she was about to prepare. We had to drive down early cuz had to send me to my condo in Puchong. I feel so bad bout all of this but there is no choice for me. We then arrived in time for lunch so I directed them to IOI mall for some delicious food from Nam Heong. My sister finally found the shop of her dreams....full of Japenese manga....and bought herself a bagful before going back....at least everyone's shopping list was fulfill. The worst thing was my bro accidentally left the camera in my bag...so here I was with a camera but no charger.....hilarious!
Not enough time!!!
I thought I calculated perfectly how much time I would have to meet up with my friends before going back to KL. Apparently not!!! I have so much more things to settle and there is only today left to do it. First, I have to pack then bake the cookies that I promised my friends then also go back to the work place to grab my stuff and my paycheck then visit my A-level friends which I have totally neglected then help Fiona take her stuff from her cousin's place with all this while getting the well deserved rest that I need to replenish my enthusiasme for a new semester of gruesome learning.
I read the article so talked bout by my single and non-single friends. When men are into you, they make the effort to make it work. If they don't seem to be responding well to your advances, that means THEY ARE JUST NOT INTO YOU and that you have to face the fact that there is nothing you can do to change that. I on the other hand has concluded that the guy who was supposed to go on many "alledged" dates but always couldnt make it was not worth my time cuz he just wasnt into me as I thought he was. Shame on me anyway for actually investing so much stupid effort into a NO-Win situation! As the tarot reading was saying, I am at a loss now and I knew then instantly that which area of my life it was.
Oh ya....on Thursday I met up with my high school gal pals from convent. It was so nice to be with them...laughing our heads off out loud ad going crazy and also doing our favourite thing...GOSSIP!! Well, you know girls wan la..can't stop their mouths when they got together. It was wonderful to relinquish those old times.
Then on Friday, I finally had the chance to go out and "hang" with my ever so busy brother. We had Japanese food and lots of exercise( I was introducing him to Para-Para...he is kinda awkward at it but he passed all the stages....so proud of him!!! ) Man...I miss those long talks we used to have. He is a wonderful brother but he lacks the ability to find joy in the everyday things. I love him so much for being the sweetest and nicest person on earth but I ache to see him bullied and not happy. I want to make him happy and he is happy just hanging out with me & so he says lar. I feel so sad not being able to accompany him during Valentine's Day which he predicts will be boring and lonely. Oh God....do spice up his Valentine's Day if not with a lover also but with many friends and lots of joy & celebration!!!!
New Year's Resolutions List for 2005
I have been putting off writing this cause I was scared (as usual) that I would write it and not be able to fulfill it. But in order to put my life back on track I will now write it down for all to see. So that you people can help me to it...ok??? Thanks a lot.....
So here goes......
1) Read at least 1 book in a month for self-improvement (esp. in increasing knowledge in unknown areas)
2) Aim to be a straight A student in all the semesters to come so that I would achieve the status of "Best Student" in the end of the course.
3) Aim to be the best in all I do
4) Lose at least 6 kgs that will stay off permanently...hahahah sounds so hard
5) Improve on self-image
6) Get my diving license
7) Go to Thailand/ Singapore with my best friend(s)
8) Invest money with returns
9) Don't be a fool to the men to play....meaning no more stupid acts for guys that I like....I'm going to make the best of my life
That's all I can think bout for now. Will add on when it does come to me. Pray hard at least by the end of the year most of it is fulfilled !!!
six sided sphere?
Don't you think that sometimes this world is a little more compliacted than it seems?? People are always talking about how wonderful it is that women are making the first moves now & they are allowed to be successful in their careers...maping their own road and making their own decisions. But how come when it comes to love...it repulses a man that the woman is the one who asks them out or initiates the first move??
Yes...the date is off. I scared him off with my maybe "clingy" attitude or something. Come on....I don't even call him everyday how could he feel so. But I never understood men so no point asking me there. Well, I guess I gave him the last chance already and if he did not appreciate it then too bad lar ho. But that doesn't mean I feel great bout myself. I still feel in the dumps but at least I know now that I did do my best. That leaves no room for any possibility of "if" on what I could have done. You want to know why??? I did the worse that no girl has done...I called the guy and asked him for the date. Talk bout initiating! Ok la...maybe I didn't really ask but it was a real real real obvious hint that no stupid moron could miss. And guess what.........I lost him!
I stopped work already....*phew* finally right?? no more complaining from me right. I actually do miss it a lot. And I hate sitting at home doing nothing and just taking over my mom's chores so that she can get some unit trust work done. I wonder how come my brother doesnt lift a finger in that department....??? His best alasan "my fingers senstive to water and dish washin liquid" ARGH....so he can become the lazy bum. I hate to cancel my movie date cuz of my mom. She asked me to rush home only to discover she has already done the errands required and I was stuck home with nothing to do.
Well, I can officially say that everyone in my group of friends is unavailable....single but real unavailable. Meaning they are either dating or just plain being "the other half". It's kinda depressing knowing that this year I will be celebrating my Valentine's Day really alone...and no more singles blues with the gals. Nothing wrong with that...guess I will start young on getting used to being the singular one in a world of couples... =0)