Thursday, January 27, 2005

Define D-A-T-E

Today I had a real good time hanging out with a good friend of mine that came back from Russia. His name is Arthur. We went shopping for a few stuff that his Russian friends begged him to bring back e.g pilot mechanical pencils & stabilo erasers. I still don't understand what is so different about the stationary in that part of the world that he has to carry so many back there for his millions and millions of Malaysian friends there. There was even a gal who asked him to import Eye-mo back....walau....not bad in the "trusting" Malaysian made products.

So anyway back to my story....so we were out. Just the two of us. People said it was a date cause it involved movie and dinner and walking a lot together on our own. Arthur said that it wasnt defined as a date cuz it didn't end with a kiss. Ok....so that is the modern definition of a date. The joke was a date either ends with a kiss or a smack. Or better still a night in a hotel. Wow....dates have really changed from the old fashioned movie with a walk on the beach then goodnight to movie, dinner & then sex on the beach with lots of goodnight kisses. Never really thought about this dating thing until I'm suddenly part of it.

Then what about books like "I kissed dating goodbye!" which emphasizes on courtship as the better path than dating. Meaning when you do chase a girl its for marriage & life but not to look for a girlfriend. So words like gf / bf don't exist in the book. But how does one actually walk in those book's footsteps. They either turn out like me....single for life or just married to "The One" if you get lucky lo. However, how lucky can one person get in a lifetime. Truthfully for me I have never won anything in my life....despite the many times I try. So far....I'm not sure which path I will follow but I do know one thing....LIFE IS SHORT....so no regrets and HAVE FUN to the fullest.....LIVE life not succumb to understanding it.....ahahahahha

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Improvement is soooo vital...!!!!

I met my high school friends from so long ago at work today. It was stock count at work today and I must have reallly looked real bad....sweaty and tired and stressed and you can imagine the rest! So anyway, the main point of my story is they looked so good. One girl who used to be overweight now looks so sexy and thin. Ok la...not very thin also but she must have lost like 30 pounds or more. And here I was grateful that I was able to lose like 5 kgs. Gosh...so ironic. The other girl....wow....she looks like a superstar. She dresses so chic and sophisticated. I almost couldnt recognize them. I was so dissapointed by their one single simple comment on "Wow, how did you manage to stay so YOU and didn't change at all in these many years!" . Meaning that I have not had ANY improvement at all since that 2 years or "growing up".

I have actually regressed...how wonderful !!! I have stopped applying more knowledge towards my brain ( gosh....I have actually stopped reading at all....with all my assignments and more!!! ). And I'm back to the old way of dressing. Normal t-shirt and skirt. No wonder guys don't turn my way anymore with looks of appreciation. I promised myself that I would make myself better but so far I have only achieved to make myself worse. People have so many bad comments bout me. Like I am too aggresive, though I thought that I have made myself less of a "push-over". I really don't understand the works of life at all.......

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Love or lust???

I met this really cool guy. He is real sweat and nice and there is always a warm feeling when you are with him. But the biggest problem is I really don't know if he likes me for who I am inside....which I don't know is special or not but let's assume so in this case la kan....it makes it a little less complicated....or he likes me for the assests I have. Gosh...I beg you please don't make me explain that part!! I will die from embarrassment and also remorse.

I might be going out on a date with him. Please don't tell my parents. They will kill me....literally!!! I'm so nervous even when we havent even set a time for the date. He has a test on Saturday and I really hope he does well. And I'm going back to KL on the 6th of February. How much more time do we have to test the waters??

As depressing as it seems, there is nothing much more to think about. It's a waste of time for me anyway since the time is so limited. It is as if it was meant not to work. And the "what if's" of this relationship that could have or not have been would haunt me for life. I'm glad to be single yet not so happy.

Oh....today my friend helped me do a tarot reading. And guess what...?? I was too tired I couldn't remember a thing. So stupid!! The only thing that I can remember is that...people perceive me as the hard-working one, which I have turned into this recent years. Oh...and my biggest hurdles in my life is that I don't put in enough money, time and effort in achieving something I want in my life...especially my love life. Thus now....Im plunging myself into this date with the guy I like...my sweetie!!!! =0)

Thursday, January 20, 2005

She's here...YEAH...but why am I not happy???

My best friend from KL is finally here….in her beloved land where she is loved and admired. I went to surprise her by meet her at the airport despite my busy schedule working 12 hours a day. Let’s just say I sneaked out!!! So, there I was waiting for her & may I say “patiently” only to find out that her flight was delayed by like 45 mins. But that was not her fault. The sad part was when she didn’t notice the fact that I came out from work just for her. But I’m not mad so don’t worry bout it. Truthfully the working thing has really had a GREAT BIG impact on my life. I don’t feel as if I fit in anymore. I feel like I have progressed in age by 30 billion years. Ok ok…maybe there was a bit of exaggeration there!!!! I just didn’t know how to act and I was always tired. I am no more the carefree, wild and spontaneous gal I used to be. I act too responsible putting priority in this “cheap labour” job. Sooooo, to cover up my awkwardness I decided to take the worst way out…talking like a parrot. Good thing Mag (my other best friend who loves KK like one of her lovers!) told me to shut up. Thank God for her sometimes!!!!

I’m kinda sad now. I feel not only left out emotionally but in real life too. Due to the fact that I am working and have a strict parental background, I can really spend those late nights out with them. Man I’m so jealous. I wish I could tell them please stay with me for one night of misery….by just going out for a nice outing that ends before 12 but guess it’s too selfish for anyone to do. I suggested an outing together to an overnight stay at my beach apartment but it felt like I was the only one excited bout it. Maybe a little too excited. But I have no say it’s their vacation!!!!

Another amazing thing happened yesterday afternoon….the MCP President’s mom recognized and talked to me. Even Mr. MCP himself was kind of shocked when dictated the whole incident to him on the phone today. His mom and friends came over to my shop to buy a few CD’s. Boy I was shaking and trying to avoid her..which was totally impossible. His mom has a real fierce look man…one that can kill with one glance!! But it’s not that bad since she actually is so cool and nice. And she pampers Mr. MCP like crazy…so I guess she is not that bad after all.

Today, I got a call from the best student in my Mass Comm class. I don’t really know if this really helps me or not. But it does create a happier atmosphere for me since I know I didn’t do all that bad in the exams. She got the same results as me!! YEAH…!!!! Now, I can’t bloat on my enemy’s failure….but then again it is not failure and she is not my enemy right??? Logic????

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Dinner with the BIG BOSS!!!

Just came back from dinner with the BIG BOSS of the company where i work. Wow...it was an incredible dinner with her....at Hyatt Chinese Restaurant. Gosh... i was so glad to be able to eat shark fin soup even before CNY arrived. YEAH!!! so happy....and i got my first try of Ox's tail. Here is the list of the menu.
1. 4 seasons cold dish (with jelly fish....YUM!!! )
2. followed by.....shark fin soup....AHHHHH....so satisfying
3. Fried Crispy Chicken...chinese style
4. Vegetable....(mushroom and couliflower)
5. Ox's Tail....such a cool dish
6.black pepper quill meat
7. fried rice
8.delicious MANGGO PUDDING

Real simple but nice....BUT the enviroment was so awkward cuz there she was staring at us with her stern face. So freaky mana ada mood want to makan anymore rite. I got one question to ask though. How come the soup come first wan then the lauk -lauk then only the rice wan???so wierd wan??? not the rice come with the dishes wan meh????

Ok...next topic. I got lots to tell cuz i have been real busy lately with the preparation of my beloved best friend coming to KK. So anyway, bout the keys that i lost in the company. I finally decided to tell the whole truth bout it. And the manager was not so angry as i thought he would be. So I was off the hook (kinda) but I know that I did not enter his black book for "horrible UNDEPENDABLE staff" . I do have to replace the key and it is enough hell actually doing it. Everyone does not have the appropriate tools to do it. *sigh*

NEXT topic!!! Well, my results just arrived. Can you imagine it was like around 1 hour ago meaning like at 11.30 pm. I still wonder how was that possible???? I am so dissapointed. It was worse than I expected but I have to be glad that I did pass. I didn't get any A's and my parents are real mad. I might get kicked real hard on the rear and banned from anything fun for the rest of my life. I WOW TO BE MORE HARDWORKING THIS YEAR!!! (which reminds me i haven't posted my new year's resolutions yet). It's not that I did not work hard for it. I did...trust me. People though I was mad!!!! This year i would be even more CRAZY.....take my word PEOPLE.............

The results are *ten* *ten* *ten* .......

Journalism 111 : Introduction to Print ...... B-
Public Relations 102 (Principles) ...... B -
Information Age ...... B
Research & Presentation ....... B+


so sad rite??? argh!!!!! I'M IN DESPAIR *screaming at the top of lungs and faints from the lack of oxygen*

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Life?? *sigh* too much trouble than it is worth

Have you ever felt that your life is going downhill...straight towards the bottom of nothingness? Well, I feel like that now! As you know a lot has been happening in my work place. Now, it is even worse. I lost the cashier key which I was holding. The thing is I remember putting it in my bag and of cuz there was no sense taking it out unless I needed it. So there I was at work this morning, and I needed the cashier keys. So happen the manager comes and HE sees me there lost and looking for the key. He was so mad he couldnt even say a word.

Now I really don't know what to do. What kind of employee am I? Man I regret even bragging that I was good. OH GOD, PLEASE HELP ME!!! I'm so dead...and this proves that I am a lousy worker and HOW AM I GOING TO SUCCEED IN LIFE....*trust me...I'm screaming this out loud now*. My dream to be a successful career woman down the drain. What kind of stupid employee loses the "sacred keys".

Besides that, my health is deteriorating (not enough sleep & too much worrying does take the toil on you). My best friends are all angry at me for not being able to spend time with them. I know not head-nor-tail of anything going on on the outside world besides those stupid VCD outlets. My English is down the drain from speaking everything else but that. Come on..how many English speaking customers do you think we get a month? Almost close to nil. I'm so freaked out about my coming results. What could get worse? I'm already down at the bottom of the pile.........



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Monday, January 10, 2005

Bowl of crap!!!

Can I ask you people out there that is working….is working life always so bad and full of headaches & disasters? I just realized that my posts all seemed to be of complaints only. Kinda annoying la rite. But then anyway I wanted to tell u what happen.

Well our beloved Rachel finally did something big. She fought with one of the salesgirls causing her to run off to another outlet late in the night. SO so saddening!!! We were so worried bout her..a girl out alone in the dangerous darkness!!! So now I'll be waiting for the full story. I’m not sure if she is fired or not lo.

Results coming out soon lo from my university. I’m so freaked out and panicked la. I did do my best and I was one of the top (sorry ah….mind my ego) of the class yet it might not be good enough. I mean the highest in the class was a 69 and that is no where near an ‘A’ so how am I supposed to obtain one for my parents.

Fiona always say that I live my life too much to please my parents. I mean she is kinda right in a way. I set my standards by what they expect me to be. I’m not that great. My brother a born genius and my younger sister even better a born genius and perfectionist. My sis is every teacher’s dream student…hardworking, willing to help, goes the extra mile to do any assignment and just so good at leadership. Hahahah….too bad my mom gave birth to such a black sheep here. I’m so normal…look so normal maybe worse than normal but let’s not go there. I’m not smart…real average(only when I work hard for it). So who can fight the better!!! I pride myself by being the neatest worker ever….hahahah…man that is some kind of joke. Well, they suck at wrapping gifts…and I’m real good at it.

So every December I get stuck wrapping the books of the 3 people studying (i.e. my bro, sis and mine) and also the whole family’s Christmas presents for everyone else. It gets a bit sucky when u have been parking your arse at the same place the whole day. Gets a bit stiff. But it's my only "sumbangan" to my family lo...what to do...

Can’t wait for Fiona to come to KK and Mag to get back from the lovely Shopping Paradise, Singapore so I can reclaim back my social life before I started working. YEAH!!! GO GIRL!!!!

Sunday, January 09, 2005

Jerks!!! me or them???? im confused......

Crap....so crap!!! Now how much more worse can the day get. U know i just written a real cool post full of pent up emotions and it just had to be accidentally erase. Now how bad is that for a person who has been using the computer for like 10 years right???

Anyway im real confused and pissed right now. I really need someone to talk this out with but so happen its late and no one is online. I do not understand men at all. Now, let me tell u the whole story!!!

This guy from my brother's workplace (named Alan) asked him to go out last nite. But that stupid guy forgot to call and made my poor bro wait the whole nite. Now how sensitive can that stupid jerk get rite?

So when my bro sms Alan. This Alan kedekut betul msg him back in MSN messenger. I was on the computer using my bro's MSN so i answered la. So we were having a real cool conversation when suddenly burst out angrily saying that we come from 2 different worlds and that there is no meaning to continuing this conversation. Now what kind of lame excuse is that?? So now i wanna know??? Who is at fault??? ARGH......men!!!!

Some poeple just suck BAD.......

Had the worst day of my life. As u all know rite….im working as a supervisor in this shop. A few weeks ago, this new girl started working at our outlet as an assistant supervisor. She acted as if she knew the rope of a supervisor and we thought she was real dependable. That was when everything started going wrong. Money from the cashier always came out short. Not by a few dollars but by exactly RM20 each day. Now this was getting annoying because yours truly here has to come out with the money. And also the other supervisor working with me (her name is Maria….real pretty gal u know).

Since I have not been working in my outlet the few days, Maria has been reporting to me all the “evil” deeds she has been doing thus causing lots of trouble for poor lil sweet Maria. She always picks a fight with Maria over the littlest of things. Like the way Maria looks at the b*tch or when the person in charge carries the cashier keys around. One more thing that makes me really wonder is right…..how does she steal the money? I mean I do keep a close watch of her but then again not all the time. She does touch the money there to return change to the customers. Does she slip the extra RM20 without us knowing? Is she such an expert thief?

Maria gets scolded everyday by the big boss cause she as nice as she see refuses to report that stupid b*tch to the “lau pan” thus putting all the blame of the disasters on herself. So here I am trying my best to do the right thing, and that thief causes more trouble pulling me into the whole big mess. Should I report her or should I not? My wallet getting a lot thinner la just cause of her. Cant really do this anymore. And I really pity Maria. She is too nice.

Oh…..on to another subject. None as depressing as this!!! My best friend said that my posts are a bit messy. So now I’m trying to make it more “less messy”…..hahahahha …..don’t think it is working though

Thursday, January 06, 2005

Girl in love with plastic...!!!!

Walau….man I got lots to say. Well, when you are working you meet a lot of interesting people or should I say you kinda notice the “interesting” people. For the first time in my life, I saw a person that was actually in love with a mannequin. As the shop that is infront of my work place is a clothes shop so it’s manifested with plastic doll. Today, I saw one of their salesgirls holding the hand of that chemically made figurine with a smug love-sick face. Now how gross can that get right? There she was standing there in front of the store…..her heart all out for that one plastic thing. Well, I guess people find love in many ways and things….hahahahha.

But then again I shouldn’t be so mean to judge her. Come on la, me on the other hand is not qualified in this department. Yes, been single all this many years of life. Smart! You guessed it right the first time…but how obvious can I get???? This modern era, I think its okay for gals to be single career woman though my brother loathes the idea of a successful independent career woman. He is categorized as part of the fan club of M.C.Ps (also knows as Male Chauvinist Pigs). And to your surprise….my best friend is the president of that so called high-class society of men from the last century.

Oh ya….today so happy!!! Dapat gaji liow. Jangan harap to ask me to belanja cuz I got a pay cut even though I was promised I wont get one due to the loss of VCD’s during the whole month of operation. But if you are nice to me....maybe u will get it...you never know!!! ;) Well, what to do….no matter how much I fought I still got the inevitable result. So I’m happy I “dapat gaji” yet sad like hell cuz I got beaten at the negotiation game and my pay is less despite how cheap a labour I am. I work 12 hours a day and my pay is half of what my brother earns. Now I bloody know how important that stupid paper called a degree is. It’s the one that differentiates the high-pay starters and the low-pay ones. Sometimes I ask myself is that fair or not. But come to think about it, the higher the investment the higher the risk but the better/higher the profit. Like being a doctor, study hard and fees so high yet many has failed & cause heartbreak to their parents and their parents’ bank accounts. But the few that do survive, live a life of luxury if they choose to do so lar. Is it really all bout finding the job that you love & makes you happy or is it ALL bout the MONEY????

My first post...!!!

Wow.....my first post! Truthfully I am so proud of myself. As some already know, im a sucker when it comes to computer. I am total illiterate when it comes to the technology of the so called "smaaaart box". Now why only now I start ah...cuz

1. People like me always follow-follow wan but wayyyyyy behind....nothing can be said bout that
2. Got motivation then only do lor....so my motivation now....cannot sleep & lots of time on hand
3. Lecturer did advice me that it's the best way to promote oneself to the society...NOT! but i thought it would be fun....thanks to the wonderful influences of Fiona....my beloved best friend.

Now...more on the confession side....I have no idea what-so-ever on how a blog should be start and how the first post should be.But who cares anyway rite??? Do i actually need to introduce myself......ugh.....so dreary!!! we wil skip that part.....u will find out sooner or later....i guess this gives a mystery to it all.....

So anyway this gud gal here has to log off soon if not her parents will chop off her head cuz she still online at this time. got to work tomolo at Karamunsing....hahahahaha...ta ta